Beautiful

In the dream I think I see a car pass by the window – going into our driveway. It looks like an old car and the color is metallic grayish – but it is night time. I get up to go out the back door and see.

I walk through the house with tension around my jaw and neck – feeling as if my head is being pushed down and a little to one side.

Outside there is no car. The sky is clear and incredible! It is filled with swirling colors, energies, lights. The stars are surrounded and connected by fields of light.

The word ‘beautiful’ comes into my mind. It emerges like a bubble – other words almost appearing but fading as it takes precedence. It seems important to know ‘beautiful’ means this. I want to write a song about it – but nothing comes into my mind about how to do that.

I begin to feel a division in my awareness. I look again at the sky – but it just seems a normal, starry night – beautiful but not the amazing vision of a moment earlier. I feel more ‘myself’ – with my usual thought processes.

When I wake up I think about how my son, who is autistic, usually sort of grimaces and pushes down on the back of his head with one hand when he passes through a room.